agmong | for tarisian

( continued from here )

Sun-mi hadn't expected to hear from the Jedi again. They hadn't seemed interested in helping her when she had first gone to them. She had been desperate then, she still was. She didn't know what else she could do - which was a lie, she had had ideas but they were all terrifying, almost as terrifying as the dreams themselves. Because that was what they had to be, right? Wouldn't she be more certain if she was killing people? If her sleepwalking had actually become... something else entirely?

Jahuani had told her not to assign guilt to herself, but how could she not? She had seen those woman's deaths so vividly, she had felt it when the life left their eyes. It made her feel sick.

She's nervous about meeting her. Scared of what it could lead to but she also can't keep living like this anymore. Sun-mi gets there early, she's paler than normal with dark circles under her eyes. She's jumpy too, she half expects something to jump out at her. It made her stand out in comparison to everyone else there but Sun-mi was past the point of caring. Once, she would do anything not to draw attention to herself but that was before the nightmares. Before she saw the woman's face on the holonet.

Could it just be a coincidence? She wasn't force-sensitive, so why was this happening if she wasn't a murderer?

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The Jedi are, to Juhani's mind, just a little bit lacking. Before she would never have seen it that way. But that was before Revan, before the Jedi whose movement had lifted her out of slavery had found her again, retasked her with purpose - and shown in so many ways that helping the individual was not a weakness.

There weren't terribly many Jedi these days, though at least the temple on Coruscant was operative again - the wars with the Sith had seen to that. And what remained was nearly in schism; the Old Guard called for the old ways - those who agreed with Revan called for an approach that engaged with the galaxy more. It would not be resolved soon.

Not that she was waiting for it to resolve. The park in question was, like all such things on Coruscant, artificially built - it was always so strange to her, to see grass on a world where she knew there to be none, in the wild. Such a far cry from the rolling hills of Dantooine. She wore a simple trader's robes, disguising her usual clothing. No need to advertise her presence. She makes sure her approach is well-telegraphed, sliding onto the bench next to Sun-mi, taking a moment to collect herself, the night air feeling quite nice against the fine, short fur on her face.

"I hope I am not late," she said, by way of introduction.

It had been her husband's wish to move to Coruscant, it was better for his business that way to be at the very heart of the galaxy, spending time with politicians. Sun-mi had never felt comfortable at all the galas and events they went to but she was all smiles and charm when she was there - at first. Before everything started changing and even then Sun-mi would go back to that because that was before the nightmares.

She shifted slightly when Juhani sits next to her. She's tense, on edge, scared of pretty much everything around them. And she is but a lot of that fear is about herself, she doesn't think she can live with the guilt if she is the killer.

"Uh... no," she didn't quite meet the Cathar's eyes as she spoke. "I got here early. Thank you for meeting with me. I never thought I'd hear from the Jedi again."

She can feel that, that knife's edge feeling - those who do not shield their emotions, which is most ordinary people, can leave those surface feelings and thoughts fairly obvious. Practitioners more skilled than her can even read surface thoughts directly, though she's not one of them.

But it compels her to help all the more.

"No thanks are needed. It is the duty of a Jedi to help. Your case seems...particularly fraught. Are you willing to tell me everything? From the beginning."

Sun-mi manages a nod and for a moment she sucks on her bottom lip as she tries to think of where to begin. Because that's the hardest part, she's not actually sure where to start. The first time she really had thought it was just a nightmare, brought on by stress over the fact she was convinced that her husband was having an affair. She hadn't been sleeping well before all of that, pressure from her publisher to release another book.

"I thought it was just a regular nightmare at first," she says after a few moments of silences. "But then I heard about a woman being murdered, exactly like in my dream. And then I saw a holo of her face and... it was her." Her fingers pull at the hem of her sleeves, needing to find something to do to keep her grounded in the moment.

She nodded, listening carefully.

"You are certain, then, that it isn't a coincidence? I have seen many things crafted by the mind, in a state of stress. Not that I doubt you, but I must ask - and, with your permission, I will try and...sense out your answer. It will tell me much, and inform our next move."

The choice of wording was careful - they were in this together, from the beginning. She was not some investigator barging into her private life, but she wanted to do things much better than that.

Sun-mi bit her lip. It was hard to explain this entire situation because so much of it didn't make sense and she didn't understand any of it. She looked down at her lap for a few moments before she looked back up at Juhani.

"They're so... vivid. I can..." her voice trailed off and she looked back down at her lap again, her stomach felt as if it was twisting into a hot and angry knot. "I can feel them die."

She didn't think she would ever recover from seeing the light leaving the women's eyes or the feeling of their bodies finally going limp. After that things were blurry. And then she'd be in bed again, either waking up from a nightmare or waking up after a night of killing someone. Which meant either she was going crazy or she was a murderer.

"I just want this to stop or... or to be stopped," she looked up again, her eyes filled with tears. "I don't care what it takes."

That much, she could feel. It struck her like a rock wall - she could feel the strength of Sun-mi's feelings, and couldn't resist reaching out a sympathetic hand, laying it overtop of hers.

"One way or the other, I will see it ended," she promised. She took several deep breaths herself, restoring her own calm - the idea that this could happen to someone was upsetting, at least to anybody with empathy, she felt.

"Let us see what can be done. We can get you a suite for tonight - a change of environment may have an effect. And I will stay by your side, the whole night. I do not require sleep in the same way as you do, necessarily. So I can be alert the entire time."

for tarisian_cathar

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/crawls back to this

I hold it as a compliment that you did...I love this thread.